Uncle Sam wants you, chicken hawks!
As Salon points out, the Army has raised the cut-off age for recruitment from 35 to 42. That's good news for all you folks who support the war, but are "too old to fight." Well, not anymore!
Another chance for a chicken hawk
Poor Jonah Goldberg.
The National Review editor and Los Angeles Times columnist has taken a lot of grief for advocating the war in Iraq without volunteering to fight it himself. Goldberg has defended himself -- "I'm 35 years old, my family couldn't afford the lost income, I have a baby daughter," he wrote last year -- but his only real friend is time: Goldberg turns 36 in March, which would put him beyond the Army's cutoff age for new active-duty recruits and out of the path of continuing scorn.
Or at least it would have. As the Associated Press reports today, the Army's recruiting woes have led to a new law that will raise the top age for active-duty recruits from 35 to 42. That gives Goldberg and other chicken hawks his age six more years in which they can sign up for the war they've been happy to have others fight.
But really, why wait that long? Forty-two U.S. soldiers have died in Iraq already this month, and recruiters are waiting by their phones to hear from their replacements.
C'mon, Jonah Goldberg! My father was a 55-year old Reservist when he was deployed to Iraq a few years ago. You've still got about 20 years on him! Oh, but maybe Whiney McGoldberg is too busy to go. Well, I'm only 28, but I'm a full-time graduate student, I'm working various part-time jobs and making the comedy rounds at night...and I still manage to find time to serve my country in the Reserves. And I've already spent a year on deployment in Operation Enduring Freedom.
Maybe Goldy's afraid he couldn't afford the loss in pay. Well, both my father and I lost money (and time) when we were deployed, but I believe that's the price fo freedom. Right? I mean, we all have to sacrifice something for freedom. Besides, our current leaders have done everything in their power to ensure our soldiers are taken care of when they return. Right?
Now that they've raised the age limit, neither my father nor I should have to serve a SECOND tour anytime soon...as long as there are plenty of healthy war-supporters out there like Jonah Goldberg who can still sign themselves up for duty!
So drive your gas-guzzlin' Hummer down to the nearest recruitment office and sign yourself up today!
What's the matter, Mr. Goldberg? Chicken?
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