Sunday, February 12, 2006

VP "accidentally" shoots some dude

Let me repeat this:

The Vice President of the United States has actually shot a man.

Cheney shoots man on Texas quail hunting trip
Man wounded in accidental shooting said to be ‘alert and doing fine’

BREAKING NEWS
The Associated Press
Updated: 4:25 p.m. ET Feb. 12, 2006


WASHINGTON - Vice President Dick Cheney accidentally shot and injured a man during a weekend quail hunting trip in Texas, his spokeswoman said Sunday.

Harry Whittington, 78, was “alert and doing fine” after Cheney sprayed him with shotgun pellets on Saturday while the two were hunting at the Armstrong Ranch in south Texas, said property owner Katharine Armstrong.

Armstrong said Whittington was mostly injured on his right side, with the pellets hitting his cheek, neck and chest, and was taken to the hospital by ambulance.

Whittington was in stable condition Sunday, said Yvonne Wheeler, spokeswoman for the Christus Spohn Health System.

Cheney’s spokeswoman, Lea Anne McBride, said the vice president was with Whittington, a lawyer from Austin, Texas, and his wife at the hospital on Sunday afternoon.

Armstrong said she was watching from a car while Cheney, Whittington and another hunter got out of the vehicle to shot at a covey of quail late afternoon on Saturday.

Whittington shot a bird and went to look for it in the tall grass, while Cheney and the third hunter walked to another spot and found a second covey.

Whittington “came up from behind the vice president and the other hunter and didn’t signal them or indicate to them or announce himself,” Armstrong told the Associated Press in an interview.

“The vice president didn’t see him,” she continued. “The covey flushed and the vice president picked out a bird and was following it and shot. And by God, Harry was in the line of fire and got peppered pretty good.”

The shooting was first reported by the Corpus Christi Caller-Times. The vice president's office did not disclose the accident until nearly 24 hours after it happened.


Here's how I think the conversation on that hunting trip went:

Cheney: So, Harry, I heard the Grand Jury's been asking you some questions...

Whittington: Hm? Oh, yeah, Dick. But you got nuthin' t'worry about.

Cheney: Of course. Of course. I just...wanted to be sure that you're on board with us.

Whittington: Oh, yeah. Don't you fret, Dick. I just answered a few questions, told them what they wanted to hear.

Cheney: But you didn't tell them everything.

Whittington: Oh, no. No. 'Course not. Don't worry, Dick. We're good. You gotta trust me.

Cheney: I'm not worried, Harry. I know I can trust you.

Whittington: I won't tell them nuthin' about you.

Cheney: I know you won't, Harry. Hey, isn't that a quail over there in the bushes?

Whittington: Where? Over --

BLAM! BLAM! BLAM!

Cheney: I know you won't tell them anything.


Aaaaaaaaaaaaand scene.